2003-01-09 2:22 p.m.
I suck.. I don't ever have time to update this. I don't have a computer anymore. My paretns are moving to New York tomorrow and guess what? Took the computer with them. Dammit. It's a good thing I work in a office where abusing the internet in the norm.
So I got my car back yesterday. I am scared to drive it. I wanted to put my guardian angel pin inside of it, but now I can't find it...that can't be good. Everytime I see brake lights my heart stops... and after a month of it being gone I couldn't wait to drive and hour and go get it and my mother saw it first and I sputtered out, so does it look good or what? And she crinkles up her nose and says it doesn't look original. Well the genius award goes to my mother who noticed that a car that just had the entire rear end rebuilt doesn't LOOK ORIGINAL. And again I see that look, that "Sara we are angry with you" look. They have a way for me to feel so guilty about something I have no fucking control over. So I get to thinking, well maybe if I wasn't on that road, if I had left work on time, if I hadn't gotten that speeding ticket two years ago, if I wasn't so stupid this wouldn't of happened. That isn't fair, people it's a fucking car, I can't take the guilt trip I get everytime I see my parents, the look of disappoinment, that I can't ever do anything right. The fact that they are moving 1200 miles from me doesn't matter, I saw my father for one of the last times this morning, and he mentions how I have to be more aware of what other drivers are doing. Insert pulling out hair motion here.
Ok enough, I am happy and content with things and I am not going to let my semi-mental parents ruin it. I will miss them and that is all I have to say about that.
Have I mentioned how much I love my boyfriend? He is my world, and now he really is being as he is all I have left. He is so wonderful and I pinch myself everyday that I have him.
Ok enough gushy stuff, I am hungry so off to lunch I go....
- - August 14, 2004
- - June 02, 2004
Cheer - March 08, 2004
It's Not a Tumor... - February 26, 2004
I need a doctor - February 22, 2004
